Life-Changing Lyrics #1

You often hear of people saying that certain lyrics, songs or artists changed their lives.

You know the way.

Oh, I’m your biggest fan, your music got me through some really hard times, and I just wanna say th-th-thank y-y- (inaudible through sobbing and tears).

So, what of stuff did it for me?

A man who could spin either rhyme or metaphor and turn it into melody.

A musical marvel.

A man who wore a baseball cap like no other.

Fred motherfuckin’ Durst :

If the above face isn’t that of a lyrical genius, then I don’t know what is, friends.

The lyrics that truly changed my life and guided me along the way are :

“Hey kids, take my advice, you don’t want to step into a big pile of shit”

(Fred Durst in “My Generation” by Limp Bizkit).

Wow. Just take it in folks.

Such eloquency.

Oh no mate. You see this pile of shit right here? Well I’ll tell you one thing you don’t wanna do : step in it. Oh no. One of the last things you wanna be doing is stepping in the afore-mentioned pile of shit.

Up until I heard this song and let these words flow from my stereo and into my soul, I’d been romping around town jumping into every pile of shit I laid eyes on. Sometimes, when all the shit had been jumped in, I overate and went into my back garden, let nature take its course, and had a lovely jump around in the shit. Everyone loves their own brand yeah?

But then along came Fred. And I realised, I don’t want to step into these piles of shit.

I’d lost all my friends. They were either sick of the smell or sick of me calling around to their houses either carrying a bag of shit for jumpin’ in, or asking them if they had any shit lying around. My clothing and washing budget was through the roof. My bowels were starting to wane under the relentless pressure they were under.

No, no, no. It was all wrong. And Fred showed me the way. In the next line of the song, he tells me what I should be doing.

“Captain’s drunk, your world is Titanic. Floating on the funk, So get your groove on.“

There it is ladies and gents. I had to get my bloomin’ groove on.

Halt this mindless stepping into piles of shit! Alas, it’s time to float on the funk and get my groove on!

And that I did.

I’d groove around the village endlessly, watching the faces of the locals as they realised shitboy was no more. I was now a groovy guy. A regular cool cat I was. I’d be groovin’ and movin’, and between women choosin’. That’s a little line I made up myself there, you can see Fred’s lyrical prowess is rubbing off on me.

So thank you Mr. Durst.

Just, thank you.

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