My first Fresh Prince’ing

Any readers who are regular internet forum readers may have seen this sort of thing.

There was a thread on the Football365 forum (which I mentioned a Sunday post) about One Night Stands. Everyone was getting into it, contributing hilarious stories, and it was a classic thread all round. Here was my post (on the 8th page!) :

“Last summer on holiday in America, I’d just had an argument with some mates and we each stormed off on our separate ways to cool off.
I found a nice little park bench, and sit down to chill out, enjoy the sun, and admire the local talent (there was plenty). After a while this typical “barbie” type of girl comes and sits down beside me. Bright blonde hair, gorgeous rack, tight shorts showing off her pins, absolute quality she was. She’d been jogging and was breathing quite heavily, which was pretty
So there I am trying to make sure little [my forum username was here] doesn’t get too excited, and she starts chatting to me. Very nice girl, the accent was a bit annoying but she was actually a lot smarter than she looked, and we had some stuff in common, particularly in music (she loved RATM ) which surprised me.

After a while, it’s getting into evening time, and she notes how we’ve been talking for over an hour.
“Really?” I say.
“Time flies…” she replies, with a cheeky smile which gave me that feeling of “hold on a minute, could I be in here?”

She says she’s got a ton of [some American dish, I can't remember the name, I was more focused on calming my erection] at home, if I’d like to sample it.
I try to keep cool and hide how utterly I am at this. She tells me lives nearby so we start walking. She grabs my hand as we walk and is playfully tickling my palm. I seriously can’t believe my luck.
As we’re walking I hear a little commotion behind me, so after trying to ignore it for a while, I eventually risk ruining the mood, and say, “What the hell is going on?” and turn around, when a couple of guys who were up to no good started makin’ trouble in my neighborhood.
I got in one little fight and my mom got scared and said, “You’re movin’ with your auntie and uncle in Bel Air” I whistled for a cab and when it came near the license plate said fresh and it had dice in the mirror if anything I could say that this cab was rare but I thought, “naw forget it yo home to bel air!”
I pulled up to the house about 7 or 8 and I yelled to the cab, “yo home smell ya lata!” I looked at my kingdom I was finally there to sit on my throne as the prince of Bel Air”

Here’s an explanation of the whole thing, for anyone who doesn’t quite understand it.

it went down quite well anyway, a few people quoting it saying how much they laughed or whatever. I’ve been waiting years to do a good Fresh Prince’ing!

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Top 20 Entrepreneurial quotes

Basically I’m sorta busy today, trying to get some schoolwork done, and not in the mood for doing a blog of my own, so I thought I’d draw attention to a nice post I found elsewhere recently, that all the entrepreneur readers out there should appreciate. The link is here, and it’s a list of the top 20 entrepreneurial quotes. For those of you too lazy to check it out, here is the list, but remember, I did not compile this list

1. I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work - Thomas Edison, inventor and scientist
2. The only place where success comes before work is in the dictionary - Vidal Sassoon, entrepreneur
3. Entrepreneurship is living a few years of your life like most people won’t, so that you can spend the rest of your life like most people can’t - A student in Warren G. Tracy’s class, entrepreneur (Thanks Daniel!)
4. The best reason to start an organization is to make meaning - to create a product or service to make the world a better place - Guy Kawasaki, entrepreneur, investor, author
5. Every worthwhile accomplishment, big or little, has its stages of drudgery and triumph; a beginning, a struggle and a victory - Mahatma Gandhi, political and spiritual leader
6. Failure defeats losers, failure inspires winners - Robert T. Kiyosaki, author, entrepreneur, investor
7. Entrepreneurs average 3.8 failures before final success. What sets the successful ones apart is their amazing persistence - Lisa M. Amos
8. Once you say you’re going to settle for second, that’s what happens to you in life - John F. Kennedy, U.S. President
9. In preparing for battle I have always found that plans are useless, but planning is indispensable - Dwight D. Eisenhower, U.S. President
10. The greatest reward in becoming a millionaire is not the amount of money that you earn. It is the kind of person that you have to become to become a millionaire in the first place - Jim Rohn
11. Some people dream of great accomplishments, while others stay awake and do them - Anonymous
12. Experience taught me a few things. One is to listen to your gut, no matter how good something sounds on paper. The second is that you’re generally better off sticking with what you know. And the third is that sometimes your best investments are the ones you don’t make - Donald Trump, real estate and entertainment mogul
13. The entrepreneur in us sees opportunities everywhere we look, but many people see only problems everywhere they look. The entrepreneur in us is more concerned with discriminating between opportunities than he or she is with failing to see the opportunities - Michael Gerber, author, entrepreneur
14. An entrepreneur tends to bite off a little more than he can chew hoping he’ll quickly learn how to chew it - Roy Ash, co-founder of Litton Industries
15. The critical ingredient is getting off your butt and doing something. It’s as simple as that. A lot of people have ideas, but there are few who decide to do something about them now. Not tomorrow. Not next week. But today. The true entrepreneur is a doer, not a dreamer - Nolan Bushnell, founder of Atari and Chuck E. Cheese’s
16. I will tell you how to become rich. Close the doors. Be fearful when others are greedy. Be greedy when others are fearful - Warren Buffet, investor and billionaire
17. I never perfected an invention that I did not think about in terms of the service it might give others… I find out what the world needs, then I proceed to invent - Thomas Edison, inventor and scientist
18. Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover - Mark Twain, author
19. There is a tide in the affairs of men
    Which, taken at the flood, leads on to fortune;
    Omitted, all the voyage of their life
    Is bound in shallows and in miseries.
    On such a full sea are now afloat;
    And we must take the current when it serves,
    Or lose the ventures before us - William Shakespeare, author
20. Genius is 1% inspiration, and 99% perspiration - Thomas Edison, inventor and scientist

Inspirational stuff eh?

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Boards.ie hilarity

I’ve decided to place any funny quotes I hear or see up here every so often.

Boards.ie is a place you’ll frequently find some hilarious threads and responses, with genuinely intelligent jokes being made. Today I read a damn good one that shouldn’t go unappreciated. The thread was in After Hours, asking the men if they’ve ever been caught letting off some “knuckle children”. You can find the full thread here

Now off all the funny replies, this one wins it for sheer unexpectedness. The guy gets your hopes up, waiting for a great story, then it just turns around hilariously ;

“I did once yeah. Man it was fucking embarrasing! Not soemthing i ever want toh appen again! I came home early from school, was about 16 or so. Noone was at home, the ma was at work, so was the da. I was walkin past my sisters bedroom, the door was open and saw a pair of her knickers on her bed, kind of a thong/frilly thing. Being a horny 16yr old i couldnt help myself, i was intruigued, so i took them into my room, started whacking off with them wrapped around the old todger, i got a bit carried away and sadly didnt notice that a couple of guys who were up to no good, started making trouble in my neighbourhood, i got in one little fight and my mom got scared, she said ‘you’re moving with you’re auntie and uncle in bel aire!’, i whistled for a cab and when it came near the license plate said ‘FRESH’ and it had dice in the mirror, if anything i could say that this cab was rare, but i thought nah forget it, yo home to bel aire! I pulled up to the house about 7 or 8 and i yelled to the cabbie, yo home, smell you later! Looked at my kingdom i was finally there, to sit on my throne as the prince of bel aire.”

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