Any readers who are regular internet forum readers may have seen this sort of thing.
There was a thread on the Football365 forum (which I mentioned a Sunday post) about One Night Stands. Everyone was getting into it, contributing hilarious stories, and it was a classic thread all round. Here was my post (on the 8th page!) :
“Last summer on holiday in America, I’d just had an argument with some mates and we each stormed off on our separate ways to cool off.
I found a nice little park bench, and sit down to chill out, enjoy the sun, and admire the local talent (there was plenty). After a while this typical “barbie” type of girl comes and sits down beside me. Bright blonde hair, gorgeous rack, tight shorts showing off her pins, absolute quality she was. She’d been jogging and was breathing quite heavily, which was pretty 
So there I am trying to make sure little [my forum username was here] doesn’t get too excited, and she starts chatting to me. Very nice girl, the accent was a bit annoying but she was actually a lot smarter than she looked, and we had some stuff in common, particularly in music (she loved RATM 
) which surprised me.
After a while, it’s getting into evening time, and she notes how we’ve been talking for over an hour.
“Really?” I say.
“Time flies…” she replies, with a cheeky smile which gave me that feeling of “hold on a minute, could I be in here?”
She says she’s got a ton of [some American dish, I can't remember the name, I was more focused on calming my erection] at home, if I’d like to sample it.
I try to keep cool and hide how utterly 
I am at this. She tells me lives nearby so we start walking. She grabs my hand as we walk and is playfully tickling my palm. I seriously can’t believe my luck.
As we’re walking I hear a little commotion behind me, so after trying to ignore it for a while, I eventually risk ruining the mood, and say, “What the hell is going on?” and turn around, when a couple of guys who were up to no good started makin’ trouble in my neighborhood.
I got in one little fight and my mom got scared and said, “You’re movin’ with your auntie and uncle in Bel Air” I whistled for a cab and when it came near the license plate said fresh and it had dice in the mirror if anything I could say that this cab was rare but I thought, “naw forget it yo home to bel air!”
I pulled up to the house about 7 or 8 and I yelled to the cab, “yo home smell ya lata!” I looked at my kingdom I was finally there to sit on my throne as the prince of Bel Air”
Here’s an explanation of the whole thing, for anyone who doesn’t quite understand it.
it went down quite well anyway, a few people quoting it saying how much they laughed or whatever. I’ve been waiting years to do a good Fresh Prince’ing!
Popularity: 14% [?]
If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!
Posted on 8 September '08 by Mark, under Computing, Life etc., Quotes. 8 Comments.
Almost a week since my last blog, I can’t remember going this long without blogging!
Anyway, I’m really struggling for time lately, so here’s a quick trick for you to try.
This worked for me in Firefox, and I haven’t tried in Internet Explorer (as IE both sucks and blows).
Go to Google Images, and search for anything you want. Then go to the address bar, and type in the following :
javascript:R= 0; x1=.1; y1=.05; x2=.25; y2=.24; x3=1.6; y3=.24;
x4=300; y4=200; x5=300; y5=200; DI= document.images ; DIL=DI.length;
function A(){for(i=0; i<DIL; i++){DIS=DI[ i ].style;
DIS.position=’absolute’; DIS.left=Math. sin(R*x1+ i*x2+x3)* x4+x5;
DIS.top=Math. cos(R*y1+ i*y2+y3)* y4+y5}R++ }setInterval(’A()’,5);
void(0)
Make sure you type in all that code. Then hit enter, and marvel at Google’s brilliance! Thanks to Stephen Lynam for showing me this.
Back to the study for me 
Popularity: 27% [?]
If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!
Posted on 11 March '08 by Mark, under Computing. 9 Comments.
Yoggie have launched a new method of Wireless Security which as we all know is very important today, with hacking and internet fraud a very common occurence these days. They’ve got a range of products to ensure your online information is protected and secure. Most of these are aimed at wireless internet laptop users, but they also offer server management products among other devices. A good video review can be found here, but I’ll give a brief overview of the product for those of you too lazy to click that link 
The main product of theirs is the Pico Personal, which seems at first to be simply a usb key, but it is infact a full computer system running Linux. You plug the product into your computer and after a few seconds it runs thirteen security processes to protect your computer, without affecting performance. Benefits of it are that you can set download limits, or simply ban certain websites or IP addresses, and it will warn you before downloading potentially harmful files, while also stopping spam and phishing. It will at most use up 15% of your CPU. This is a huge benefit as most security programs tend to slow down your system and you end up uninstalling them.
To learn more and keep up to date with news from Yoggie, check out the Yoggie CEO Blog, better safe than sorry!
Popularity: 14% [?]
If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!
Posted on 23 January '08 by Mark, under Computing, Reviews. 1 Comment.
I’ve gotten another infraction on Digital Point. Infractions are given to you by moderators when they find you misbehaving on there. The reason I’m going to the bother of actually blogging about this is the fact that it was totally worth it. Basically some guy, a very foolish guy, started a thread selling an ebook on how to stop watching porn and masturbating. This is on a webmaster forum for god’s sake! So naturally, I have to take the piss. I tell him “Yeah I want to buy but my hands are far too busy to click the purchase button”
And I get an infraction for that! An “Inappropriate Post/Thread”.
I understand them deleting my post, but I didn’t expect an infraction for it to be honest. For those who want to see the (now closed) thread, click here. Who else would have done the same I wonder?
Popularity: 9% [?]
If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!
Posted on 10 November '07 by Mark, under Computing. 6 Comments.
A while back I posted about the RSS competition between John Chow and Shoemoney.
Up until the last day of the competition, it looked as if John Chow had it in the bag. Not only was he in the lead in terms of getting more subscribers for the month, but he had overtaken Shoemoney’s total number of subscribers.
However, in the last day, Shoemoney showed us he had some trick up his sleeve, and he somehow gained a few thousand new readers in one day. There’s been questions as to whether he cheated on this, or used some underhand method, but either way, he’s very clever, and pretty evil to let Chow get his hopes up and then dash them on the last day. 
Speaking of RSS, I seem to have gotten a few extra subsribers lately. Now at the moment it’s only at ten, as it generally goes down at weekends, but for a few days this week I was at 18, which is respectable enough I think, considering I still haven’t advertised the blog as much as I want to. I submitted an article to Digg this week too, and got a few free digg exchanges, so if you’d like to digg the article for me (it takes two seconds!) then click here. Merci Beaucoup.
Anyone who wishes to subsribe to my RSS feed can do so by clicking on the box below, which is also found at the sidebar of the page 
Popularity: 11% [?]
If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!
Posted on 3 November '07 by Mark, under Computing. 1 Comment.
When I was in Tesco the other day, I couldn’t help noticing that the had a fair few computers for sale. Now it was no big brand name, but there appeared to be pretty impressive specs. 20″ monitor included, 2gb RAM, 250gb hard drive, all for €699 I believe. With those specs, that for me is pretty good value.
But what if you wanted to ask something about the thing before buying? I don’t think many supermarket workers would have the answer for you. And on top of that, if there were any problems, who would deal with those? At least when you buy from PC world or somewhere like that, you know the people there are qualified to help you with anything you need.
I have to admit I’d be tempted to buy from Tesco all the same, chances are you’re only paying extra for a nice brand name on a computer from somewhere else. What do the readers think about buying a computer from the supermarket?
Popularity: 8% [?]
If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!
Posted on 23 October '07 by Mark, under Computing. 6 Comments.
This weekend some of my french homework had to be done online. Because of this, the homework didn’t seem like as much of a chore, probably because I associate being on the computer with leisure time. But even so, it was much handier this way, and this led me to thinking that way more of our school work should be done on a computer. Ask teenagers these days if they prefer typing or writing in a copy, I reckon the majority would say typing.
Also, it’d be a lot more environmentally friendly this way, if we could type up our homework and send them to the teachers for correction. Another blogger, Smemon, is currently doing a paper watch at his college course. This means he totals up how many sheets of paper he receives every week. He’s doing a computer course, so every person doing it obviously owns a computer with internet access, and despite this, he gets hundreds of sheets of paper in handouts a week. It’s all so wasteful really. Also there’s a lot less chance you’ll lose your information when you have it saved onto your computer rather than on some sheet at the bottom of your bag.
Technology and computers are the way forward, and everyone knows this, so why aren’t we actually employing this knowledge?
Popularity: 7% [?]
If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!
Posted on 14 October '07 by Mark, under Computing, Education. 3 Comments.
Got my lappy back today, all seemed well. But, the screen is horribly fucked. White is appearing green, and it’s all so pixelated or something. I’ll try get a couple pics up later. Videos in Windows Media Player have only audio, and in VLC they play but look horrible.
I’ll head down to them at the next chance I get, but I did accept that there’d be no warranty with the “botch job”.
What a load of wank this is. And my hard-drive won’t be back to me before Tuesday, that’s presuming they can actually fix that,
Popularity: 8% [?]
If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!
Posted on 15 September '07 by Mark, under Computing. No Comments.
Eventful day today. Woke up to bidding up to 35$ on my recipe site. Was up to 40$ before leaving the house - savage. Came home for lunch - 45$. So I start downloading my server backup ( so I can send the site files) and head back to school. Come home from school to find my laptop battery nearly gone, it had somehow become unplugged. So I desperately try to sort it out, as it beeps every two seconds to alert me in case I didn’t notice already. It was all very frantic, and in the end, I discovered the little bar at the back of the laptop that the charger plugs into was gone, and I suspect into the laptop. So this means I’ve to bring this down somewhere asap to get it fixed, as I need it to do all my business plans I’ve got going. So I bring it down to Lucan Computers along with my external hard-drive, which is also broken. I’ll give the long story of what they said soon, but for now, basically I’ll be waiting a few days to get my laptop back, possibly a week. And it’ll cost me. And that’s if they actually can fix it. I’m seriously the most unlucky person when it comes to technology. Everything breaks on me.
So right now I’m using the crappy laptop we have, which is slow, with slow internet. So expect things to be a bit slow for a while.
On the upside, recipeselite.com sold for $50, and I’ve gotten payment already. And the best part is that the guy doesn’t want me to send him the site for a few days, so that’s completely perfect for me. Pretty funny story about how something I said on this blog actually got me a bid for recipeselite because the guy found it so funny apparently. But that’s for a time when I have good internet.
For now, goodbike.
Popularity: 8% [?]
If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!
Posted on 13 September '07 by Mark, under Business, Computing, Life etc.. No Comments.
I’ve sorted my laptop troubles, and all is well in the land of Walsho.
Downloading the correct drivers is so underrated.
Popularity: 9% [?]
If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!
Posted on 9 August '07 by Mark, under Computing. 1 Comment.
