A Gentle Reminder

Right so, Trinity Ball was last Friday, the 8th. My exams start next Monday, the 18th.

So in the time after the ball, I should be studying pretty intensely, yeah?

Anyway. When collecting my ticket for the ball on Friday, I was given a packet of condoms and a box of jellybeans. Score.

Today, nearly a week after the ball, and with three days until my exams, I opened my school bag, and there lay the condoms and the jellybeans.

Here are the reasons why this is depressing :

1. I clearly have not done any study since the ball. I literally hadn’t opened my fucking school bag.

2. I clearly have not been neglecting my studies for what is possibly the only justifiable reason - Monkey business. Doing the deed. Banging. Nookie. It. Sexual intercourse.

3. I opened the pack, hoping to be cheered up by some sugar (yes, I opened the jellybeans, before any wisearse pipes up with a poshwank joke! I know how some of your minds work - just like mine) and got a fucking Cafe Latte flavoured one (again, I’m talking about jellybeans). I would genuinely prefer to pop a rabbit turd in my expectant gob.

A gentle reminder from the world, have sex study.

The ball was good though, despite the atrocious line-up.

And I’ve just gotten an apple flavoured jellybean. Everything’s comin’ up Walsho!

If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!